Sunday, December 14, 2008

Taking a chance wit Love

In most people eyes, finding that one true love is that ultimate goal in life. You go through so much bullshit to find it, that sometimes when you discover it, you are battered and torn. What is life without love? Is the freedom of being single and alone that great that many people flee the greatest challenge in the world, and that's being with one person for the rest of their lives?

a friend of mine decided to share this with me.. and i was so inspired by what it said; i decided to share it. i feel like everyone needs to read this; and def take notes. its some for ur axx..


"Let's go through some of the advantages and disadvantages of being single. When I was single and wild, I had some of the funnest times of my life. The stories and the memories are enough for ten men. I was a celebrated athlete most of my young adult life. I am tall, black, attractive and educated. I have no kids and pretty much have been able to talk to most women I've been attracted to. Not because I look that much better than most men, maybe it was my charm. Who knows, but I sure in hell took advantage of it.

The advantage of being single had me getting up everyday free of stress and free of guilt. I could come and go as I pleased. When I went out to a club on the weekends, I didn't have to worry about checking in or feeling bad I stayed out late. When a woman who didn't know me approached me and asked if I had a woman, I use to say it with pride, HELL NO!!!! I never understood why people wanted to be in relationships, everyone that I knew, were not happy. It was drama all the time. Who wants to be in anything when there not happy? Not me. When you are working a job that sucks or the pay isn't that great, most of the time you seek other avenues. Relationships should not feel like a job!! The single life really allows you to focus on life and discover who you really are as a person and what you want for yourself. But sometimes it can be a disadvantage and throw you off course.

For some, being single is a big party. They can go out and hang with their boy or girls and just kick it all the time. I believe in the saying, "Misery Loves Company". Many of my friends are single or heartbroken from past relationship. So the fact that you're free to talk to and hang is there therapy for their selfish reasons. Watch how many people change when you're happy in a relationship and not able to go out like you use to. I seen many friends come and go for these reasons. Mad cause you're happy and in something they wish they were in. So what happens is that the friend turns on you or tries to convince you that relationships suck and you don't need to be in them. Real friends are happy for you and want to see things that are good in your life work. Fake friends, have you out in clubs all the time or in situations that jeopardize the one thing good in your life and never care how your personal life is affected. As long as you are there for them, they are happy.

Remember those days when it was storming or freezing outside? You all always want a person to cuddle up with. You say to yourself I wish I had someone to snuggle up with. I know I have said that many times. Or when the club is played out and the same people are there. You're like I wish I had someone to just chill and watch a movie with. When people get what they want, they usually don't want it anymore. The reasons are a mystery. You always think the grass is greener on the other side. When actually it is the opposite!!! You may be in a rocky relationship and you think to yourself, maybe it's someone better out there for me who has more or looks that much better than the person you're with. When actually it's the curiosity picking at your pride. The fact that most people happy seem to be boring to most single people is funny. I was that single person who looked at couples and thought, that has to get boring. But I didn't know what love meant. I was really the boring one. Going to clubs every weekend and meeting girls. Going on dates, spending money on strangers and never seeing them again. No matter how smooth I appeared to be. Every night for the most part I would go to bed alone, even when someone was there with me. I didn't know that person, so to me I was alone.

That's a horrible feeling. Being single is pointless!!!

I can guarantee to all of the people that think being single has more to offer than being in a relationship, your fooling yourself. There is nothing like the feeling that your significant other birthday is coming up. Or Christmas, New Years is around the corner. What about those plans to take a cruise or party in Vegas with some of your friends together. The nervous feeling of meeting someone parents or friends for the first time; is a rush that is beautiful. It's like a championship game tied in the fourth quarter.

Have you ever gotten bad news about a friend or family member and you cried like a baby. For some they have did that alone, no one there to comfort them. No one there to tell them it will be ok. I think the fear of being vulnerable to people makes them cold hearted. I was that way and many people I know are.

That's the wonderful thing about taking a chance with love. You put your heart out there to get broken. But the award is without a doubt worth the risk. The chance to find a person that you don't have to be fake for. Someone who laughs at the most stupid things you do and think they are so cute. The person, who allows you to be imperfect at times but still, loves you for it. Someone who tries just as hard to help you succeed with your dreams and you would on your own.

Knowing someone cares about you as much as you do for yourself is the reason why taking a chance with love is worth the risk of being heartbroken. Things happen. People breakup or sometimes a person who appeared perfect for you is not. But the world will go on like it did the day before you discovered that the person you with is not the one for you. You have to believe someone is out there searching for you.

Me knowing how miserable being single is, even when it appeared that I was having fun, it is not as fulfilling as taking that chance with love. I don't want go out and come home to an empty bed, wishing someone special was there. Even if you're lucky to bring someone home, do you really want them there or is it, self pity that you gamble your heart and health with a stranger.

Many people say all the time; I know what's out there in the clubs or the dating scene. I'm sure the lack of motivated, honest, caring and loving people can fill up a NFL stadium in any city alone. But many people never grab on to the reality that there is more in the world for them than a 4am bed time. What does that do for you really? Did you make yourself happy you partied until the early morning or you were flirting all night with an attractive person who appears to be a good guy or girl? When you wake up in the morning to brush your teeth or wash off the makeup you left on the night before, ask yourself a question. And that question is this!!!! Am I really making myself happy doing what I'm doing or am I trying to please others? Because if you're making yourself happy with what you're doing, keep doing it. But if you are doing things to keep friends happy, I hate to say that you're being fake to yourself. Go and find happiness and take a chance to love someone and I'm sure you will be rewarded."

Thanks Teck for sharing this story with me.


DIVINA said...


Sairy said...

yea...sure! sooooooooo does he have a brother??? lol im so bad!!!

supreme. said...

cute page & good post.

JuJu said...

[Divina:] me too!!

[Sairy:] haha idk; its one of my good friends boy.. she made me sit and read this yesterday and i was like.. "damnn i gotta share this as well" haha.

[Supreme:] thanks boo!

Miss.Stefanie said...

I posted something like that on my blog on Myspace. However-I find being single is harder than people think.

JuJu said...

[Miss. Stef:] yea that's kinda the point of it; letting people know being single isnt all what its cracked up to be.

Tuotierugif >^..^<© said...

I believe in certain aspects of this but right I feel like being single is best for me but I def wont give up the chance if I feel true love/happiness has come my way lol

William H. said...

thats deeep hun...good post

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